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by The Peak Oil Poet


Napalm 21 (Psalm 21)

George Bush is my oil man – I shall not want
He makes me down to lie
In Oil lands rich; He leadeth me
And those that speak out shall die.

My tank he doth restore again;
And me to drive doth make
and for the God of commercial gain
The world’s last oil he’ll take

Yea, though I drive for miles and miles
Yet I will fear no ill
For George will find the gas I need
My SUV he’ll fill

My gas tank he hast furnished
despite our Arab foes
My life he dost with oil anoint
And my tank overflows

Goodness and mercy all my life
Shall surely follow me;
And in the white house forevermore
His dwelling place shall be.


The Lord’s Prayer

Our Oilmen, who art in Washington
Hallowed be thy Names.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done,
In Iraq as it is in Washington.

Give us this day our daily gas.
And forgive us our lying ways,
As we ignore those who protest against us.
And lead us not into depletion,
But deliver us from shortage.
For ours is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory,
for ever and ever.



I Can Still Remember the Time Before the Crash

I can still remember the time before the crash
when we all drove around in cars and I had lots of cash
and anything I wanted, I’d just go out and buy
I’d even drive a mile or two - just to buy a pie

but then the oil wars started and everything collapsed
the supermarket shelves were stripped before a month elapsed
and people all turned really grim and gained a hungry look
we’d steal from anyone at all we’d kill for things to cook

and everywhere disease and grief and bodies left to rot
while gangs of grim and brutal men would kill and steal and plot
and people fled the cities and countless numbers died
and everything was so so bad not even mothers cried

our house was one of many then, a normal family home
but it was stripped and burnt for fuel when we had left to roam
and I remember mum and dad, my little sister too
but they were killed and eaten back sometime in ‘22

and now I know I’m dying, I’ve left no living heirs
nobody is alive to know there’s not a soul who cares
there’s only me so damned hungry I’m gnawing at the trees
there’s no-one left to kill and eat oh God please help me please

and as I stagger on and on through burnt and plundered homes
I see the the signs of rage and ruin and countless human bones
I hear the starving pack of dogs that follow close behind
and I am now so close to death I hardly even mind

I fall and screaming dogs begin to rip and shred my life
my mind drifts back to days of oil and to my kids and wife
oh life was so so simple then and life was so so good
but all we had we wasted, we never understood


Fill Up Your Attic With Brand New Shoes

Fill up your attic with brand new shoes
a pair a week until the oil-crash news
pick sizes and styles that will sell and last
because when there’s no cars shoes wear out fast

Don’t tell a soul (I intend no pun)
you can’t defend against a grim mans gun
pack some for you - you’ll need some too
and maybe some tacks and maybe some glue

and all the things that strugglers need
some axes and shovels and long-life seeds
and fishing tackle and guns and bows
and books on things that nobody knows

and needles and thread and lots of wool
and keep it up ’til your attic is full
tell no-one at all not even your kin
just store it and wait for the fun to begin

and maybe those shoes will be worth more than gold
and worth more than diamonds whenever they’re sold
and with care and with skill your attic will be
a bank for your future, just try it and see


All My Life I’ve Waited

Well all my life I’ve waited and waited patiently
for an honest politician or two or three maybe
someone to spur my faith in men and women who might lead
some bright and honest leader not consumed by power and greed

I’ve waited nearly 50 years and watched you all go by
from left and right and center I’ve seen you have a try
I’ve heard you all, your ways and means, I’ve even followed polls
I’ve sometimes even had a vote and joined electoral rolls

but mostly I’ve grown sick and tired of waiting for my vote
there’s never seemed to be a point and so this poem I wrote
it’s written to you leaders, you lot who seek to lead
who take our hard earned money and let the country bleed

you think you have a mandate to choose the way we go
you even think you have the right to judge what we should know
you all assume you’re smarter and know the ins and outs
the ropes of legislation - cause we’re all dumb-ass louts

and so with little more at all than just ideals and whim
we’re very soon committed - and all must sink or swim
you’re led around by snout and ear by lobbyists with cash
and wined and dined like royalty and dressed to cut a dash

you stand in pomp and circumstance delivering address
while all your social policy becomes a stinking mess
I’ve met so many leaders and members prom-in-ent
and listened to them speak their case, considered their intent

but not a one, not ever, has piqued my confidence
nor even ever made me think that they are ought but dense
how many of you have a clue as much as even me?
I know that I am better schooled than you will ever be

and yet you think to lead us, to be our heart and soul
but none of you have any clue what should be now our goal
the peak in productivity of oil and gas has come
and very soon a world of shit is what it will become

I used to think the Greens maybe would lead us through the mess
but no, Jeanette Fitzsimmons even seems to not care less
for other things important are playing on her mind
and winning seats in parliament is all her work you’ll find

and that’s the crux, the problem of our democracy
it’s geared to periods too short or so it seems to me
before you’ve had a chance to forge some hope that we might win
again the time as come to vote and change the shit we’re in

but that is all you ever do you leaders at the top
and I forever wonder when this mess will ever stop
I watch my kids and grandkids grow and all the time I think
that maybe they will perish soon in all your mess and stink

I beg you now to stand up tall and start to make a change
to fight for true democracy that seems to you so strange
democracy is not at all a case of win and rule
democracy means citizens - a massive voting pool

where every single law you make is argued by us all
not argued just between you dolts then forced upon us all
come greens and Limbaugh lovers come independents too
come lefties too I beg you there’s much for you to do

start looking out beyond just now and educate us all
and seek to make this country one where we can all stand tall
try looking now at Sweden where they all know what comes
and guide us with a loving heart and please stop being bums

the future will be horrible we educated know
and now we want our leaders too to know the way to go
try speaking out more bravely, try speaking out at all
try giving up your party goals and save us from the fall

for Olduvai is coming (go google that and read)
the peak of oil will cause a crash so bad that we will need
a nation geared to live it through a people bold and brave
and so my good and noble readers here I end my rave


Our Hero Sought To Save Us All

Our hero sought to save us all
but we refused to hear
he worked and slaved to teach us
with rising dread and fear

“you must perceive” he cried and cried
but all we did was jeer:
“there’s plenty left” was our reply
our leaders gave a sneer:

“extremist people just like you
don’t understand the game
it’s market forces we obey
and shifting votes and blame”

“just understand the price will rise
and magic will ensue
the market it will save us
not idiots like you”

and so our hero hung his head
and wrung his hands with pain
his heart was torn with fear and dread
at all our children’s pain

for he looked ever onward
towards the coming fall
with grim anticipation
with what could kill us all

and though he thought to give it up
his calling and his quest
he summoned up his mighty will
and dug deep for his best

and so the years unfolded
and soon the Peak had come
but we all smiled and laughed aloud
’cause we knew what he’d done

he’d saved us from our ignorance
he’d fought our lazy ways
he’d banged our heads with words of truth
cause he’s the one who stays

we thank you dearly Robert
we understand it now
we know that we are worthless yobs
but you love us anyhow


When the Bankers go to Jail

the bible tells us not to steal
it’s there in black and white
our laws are based upon it too
do not do wrong - do right

but somehow since these laws were writ
we’ve seen the system fail
but things will change for all the best
when the bankers go to jail

when the bankers go to jail my friends
when the bankers go to jail
we’ll finally see justice done
when the bankers go to jail

when the vampire squid has been deep-fried
in the slime of Bernank’s words
when politicians tell the truth
and not be lying turds

when "austerity" applies to them
and fairness does prevail
we’ll finally see justice done
and the bankers go to jail

when the bankers go to jail ee-hah
when the bankers go to jail
we’ll all be dancing in the streets
when the bankers go to jail

if all was as it ought to be
when any business fails
investors take a haircut
amid their tears and wails

but in our mean kleptocracy
that the MSM does hail
the working man pays all the bills
and no banker goes to jail

when the bankers go to jail thank God
when the bankers go to jail
the haircuts will be number ones
when the bankers go to jail

we’re predators i must admit
it’s human nature too
to seek a better living for
our wives and children too

but animals we’re not you see
it not just fine detail
we keep the law, control ourselves
and the bankers go to jail

yes you bankers go to jail you scum
all you bankers go to jail
you’ll be some brother’s jail-house bitch
when you bankers go to jail

you may think it’s a silly dream
to think of their demise
they’re oh so very powerful
and every banker lies

but one day soon we’ll overthrow
and have them by the tail
we’ll tar and feather all of them
and send them all to jail

when the bankers go to jail for good
when the bankers go to jail
we’ll hear the bells of freedom ring
when the bankers go to jail

first published: 07/12/2011 at http://www.zerohedge.com/


Fred and Bill

Fred said “Bill i think we’re fucked”
to which Bill asked “why so?”
“well”, Fred began (not in a rush)
“i can’t say that i know

but what i see when i look around
is freakin’ me fuckin’ out”
Bill, thought a bit and then replied
“so what’s this all about?”

“oh Bill this damned economy
just doesn’t make much sense
we all work and we pay our way
for little recompense

and every year it just gets worse
the news is always grim
there’s less and less employment
and the profits are so slim

and housing, what a fuckin’ mess
those thieving bankers wrought
has left most underwater
on any house they bought

and all those folks in Europe now
their leaders sold them out
the average workin’ family
there knows not what it’s about

and China, bloody China, look
it’s like a monster fire
a burnin’ all and everything
in a global funeral pyre

and all that carbon in the air
they say we’re gonna cook
and all the oil is runnin’ out
there’s nowhere left to look

and people, Bill the people -
there’s billions of us now
and millions more are born each day
who’ll feed them all and how?

i tell you Bill I’m in despair
i’m almost without hope
the future’s looking so so bad
i don’t know how i’ll cope”

Bill pondered for a while Fred’s words
with heavy heart and mind
he had to cheer his partner up
with gentle words and kind

“Fred, listen man it’s not so grim
there’s so much out there yet
the planets, well we’ll mine them too
and think of what we’ll get

remember Chris Columbus?
he found a brave new land
with oil and gold and silver to
so see and understand

the universe is infinite
it’s ours there just to take
there’s nothing that can stop us
there’s nothing we can’t make

some times are tough and some are good
we do the best we can
we bear the worst, enjoy the best
so lighten up ol’ man”

and Fred, he did, he swallowed it
and heaved a mighty sigh
a smile broke out upon his lips
he waved and said goodbye.

And as his best friend walked away
Bill, cried a bit inside
because you see our Bill he thought
to Fred he’d downright lied

“there’s no bright future for our race
we’re fucked and Fred was right
we’re so so fuckin’ stupid
that in the end we’ll fight

we’ll fight and kill in millions
we’ll drag our neighbors down
we’ll kill and steal and lie and cheat
and in our shit we’ll drown

the rich will party on and on
the poor will starve and die
the middle class will whither
and our mothers they will cry

we’re terminal our species
like beasts we are but worse
and all the beauty we create
adorns our funeral hearse.”

And as ol’ Bill did walk away
into the setting sun
the sound of drunken revelry
had only just begun

first published: 07/13/2011 at http://www.zerohedge.com/


There Is No Fat Left in the Land

there is no fat left in the land
we’ve sucked poor Gaia dry
we’ve partied while we raped and burned
what’s left? Who knows? Not i

we’re predators who’ve preyed ‘til now
on everything we saw
but all that’s left to prey upon
is us. So now it’s war.

The strong will prey upon the weak
the young upon the old
to keep the middle class alive
our children will be sold

descent to bloody anarchy
will shred our civil skin
the truth of what we really are
is just now sinking in

we’re all so nice and proper
when Gaia foots the bill
but now the piper must be paid
that means we have to kill

“we have to kill the bankers
the politicians too
the CEOs and billionairs
kill them and all their crew

and all with aspirations
to grow and grow and grow
we’d better knock that on the head
and put their heads on show”

and when were scabbling in the dirt
for anything to eat
and almost everyone is dead
“oh boy will that be sweet”

we’ll be what we were in the days
before our “reason” dawned
before we dreamed that we were gods
before our greed was spawned

we’ll fade and die a species
that might have had the stars
but lacked some fundamental thing
we used up in our cars

first published: 06/26/2011 at http://energybulletin.net/


Peak People

I’ve heard about the oil peak – depletion of reserves
and doomers claiming that we’re screwed is getting on my nerves
and prices going ever up no matter what the cost
but the real problem seems to be peak-people

The talk of global warming – all the carbon in the air
the scientists are warning – but tax payers do not care
and all the talk on carbon tax has left me feeling lost
so I guess I’m just another stupid sheeple

I’ve often wondered if the peak of population looms
and our time is bright but short just like a fleeting flower blooms
and maybe there’s no going back the tipping point’s been crossed
‘cause we’re all of us the most we’ll be – peak people

If it’s lonely at the pinnacle of seven billion souls
far lonelier it is to be the last left digging holes
to bury all our kindred dead their tombs might be embossed
with the simple words “here lies the last of people”



So what are all these “flations”
that people talk about?
it’s plain that there’s at least two sides
two sides that scream and shout

“deflation” screams Mish Shedlock
Puplava he says “no!
Inflation is the way of things
I’m rich so I should know”

We’re common folk who walk the streets
and spend our hard earned cash
on things we need to live each day
so we should not be rash

Or take a risk on borrowing
when all could turn to shit
oh no we must be careful now
we’re hording every bit

So when we hear “inflation” yelled
across the MSM
we’re worried that our savings will
be worthless in the end

and when we hear “deflation”
we scratch our heads and think
the falling value of our house
is headed for the sink

don’t tell me it’s velocity
or credit we can spend
or talk of printing money
that is worthless in the end

the truth is that reality
has crept up from behind
while we were drunk on boundless oil
that anyone could find

as asset prices crash and burn
and milk and bread costs rise
the net effect is just the same
for us it’s no surprise

if anything cost all our cash
it’s value will decline
and anything we need to live
will climb and climb and climb

so take your stupid “flations”
and shove them where it’s dark
the simple truth is that we’re fucked
it’s simple, true and stark